Wednesday, July 10, 2013

Feeling Fat (It’s Not What You Think)

I’ve been feeling fat lately.

But not in the way you may think.

I know that I don’t I LOOK fat. Sure, some of my clothes are a bit snug due to this little recent weight gain, but they still fit. And since I’m still working out, I do think that my body is continuing to change in a positive way. Besides, I’ve been at this long enough to know that gaining a little bit doesn’t instantly make you go from skinny-mini to beached whale status. Especially when you are tall, like me.

So when I say I FEEL fat, I mean just that: it’s how my body FEELS. It’s just like how I felt before I turned my life around and started getting active.

I feel sluggish, like I have less energy for no particular reason.

I feel frustrated with myself, for letting food have control over me (as if I don’t have a choice in what I put in my mouth).

I feel disappointed with myself for temporarily treating this lifestyle change as a diet, and becoming so strict that I felt the need to rebel against it.

That is what I mean when I say that I feel fat. I may look better, but my emotions better match where I was almost a year ago. And I don’t want to go there again.

Yes, it’s been almost a year since I since I rediscovered my love of exercise and healthy food. Let’s hope that, in the next couple of weeks until then, I can continue to improve.

P.S. Yikes! My blog has seriously been lacking pictures lately! Sorry about that!

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